Over the past decade, I have been asked to help many clients who have been negatively affected by social media. Recently, I was so inundated with clients who were experiencing a social media crisis that I felt compelled to help my readers in this arena!

Some individuals receive critical, angry or even hateful responses to their pictures or words; some  are bullied; some have painstakingly worked to create material to post that receives absolutely no feedback; and some are racked with jealousy of what others are doing or pretending to be doing 😉 What are some useful approaches for dealing with these social media crises?

Here are some powerful tips to help you overcome three of the main social media crises:

1. Anger or Bullying on Social Media

Last summer, I posted a picture of myself at the gay pride parade, reminding others that love is love. The hateful message I received from one man was absolutely shocking.

When someone responds angrily in writing to something they read on social media, there is always a connection to themselves or someone to whom they are close. Was this man ashamed of his sexuality? What was he hiding? Was he bothered his son or daughter was gay? All I knew was that he was struggling. I kindly messaged him, telling him I would remove him from my contact list.

When I started marketing my spiritual seminars, I faced another social media crisis. I had one man message me, swearing and saying “If this stuff sells, I must be the worst salesman!” Ironically, those seminars were free and even more ironically, the room was packed each and every time with the majority feeling quite emotional.

And the majority DID NOT state on social media that they would be attending my spiritual seminars! I stopped doing Event Pages on Facebook because they can say 5 people are attending a seminar or event when 70 people actually attend.

I wrote the man that gave me a hard time and told him that I could never be a better salesperson than him (yes, I actually knew him!) and, again, kindly told him I would remove him from my contact list. Clearly, he had thought his message went to my administrative staff – not to me – and he ended up apologizing.

Every time another person is mean to you or acts without integrity on social media, you are presented with an opportunity to respond with love and kindness! What does this do for you? It literally helps you feel good about yourself!

Anyone that is mean or bullies you on social media is not happy in their own life. Think back to when you fell in love – would you ever have attacked, been critical or hurt another at that time? Absolutely not.  When we are truly feeling happy, we are filled with loving and good feelings.

Now reading this, I hope that you can see how to feel compassion for a bully or help another accomplish this. What if you were bullied and reached out to your bully privately or publically and pointed out that you know they are hurting and offered to help them in some way? Oh yes, you can do that!  They might be angry because you have hit upon the truth but the truth can also take the wind out of someone’s sails, right?            

2. A Lack of Response to Your Pictures or Words on Social Media  

What do you do when you post a picture or words and no one responds to you or likes what you have posted? This could be a self-imposed social media crisis.

If you like your post or you believe it’s important to keep it on your page, all that you need to say to yourself is “That post is important to me” or “I like it. Maybe my next post will be received with more enthusiasm.”

You see, when you write for yourself and are proud of your creation, that’s what fills you up inside. I write for myself. Yes, I want people to benefit from my unique perspective 😉 but the satisfaction I personally receive from writing supersedes all else. When that is your main reward, what others do concerns you far less, doesn’t it?

3. Feeling Jealous or Irritated by the Posts You See on Social Media

You see your friend is on yet another incredible trip; your colleague has more attendees at their seminar than you do; your other friend posts too often in your mind and you feel inundated; your acquaintance has lost the weight you want to lose; someone else you know is always photo-shopping their pictures and another one brags too much. The list of possibilities is endless.  What do you do?  

Your relationship with social media reflects your relationship with yourself. There is one answer to all of this. Fall in love with who you are. The more you come to love and appreciate yourself, the more you will love and appreciate others and the more you will enjoy social media!!!!  If you are happy with yourself, social media shouldn’t have a strong impact on you in one way or another.  

If others are doing what you want to do with your life, start setting goals, so that you can do the things that make YOU proud of yourself!  If one friend is always altering their pictures, you know they are not happy with who they are and your heart can go out to them. And remember, you don’t need to click “like” when you see their pictures! And those people that are bragging too much simply don’t know their value, so they continually crave validation….that’s all that’s going on there.

Social media puts human beings in the spotlight like nothing else ever has. We are all working on becoming happy and being the best people we can be. None of us knows our value entirely. None of us is perfect and if you think someone you follow on social media is, you need to know that you are wrong. If any of us were perfect, we would not be here. The perfect souls don’t need to come to this difficult school called Earth.      

Social Media Doesn’t Always Lead to a Crisis

Social media gives each of us a voice, a way to be heard, and a method for sharing. It provides us with opportunities to learn and grow, as well as teach and help others grow. It affords us a way to grow our businesses and make money, so we can provide for our families. It helps us stay in touch or reconnect with friends and loved ones, going all the way back to the day we were born. 

Social media allows us to feel connected to others and be comforted when any of us are in pain. It gives us the chance to be remembered on our birthdays or other special occasions and to celebrate together. Social media helps us see the wonder that perpetually exists all around us. And social media makes us smile and laugh!

I invite you to see the beauty in social media, as opposed to seeing one social media crisis after another. Social media is a huge gift for which we can be immensely grateful. The more we allow ourselves to see the good, the more we will attract the good into our lives. Remember – what we focus on becomes our reality.   

Hi! I’m Meredith Deasley, a certified life coach, registered holistic nutritionist, published author, speaker and teacher. To learn the steps to coming to love yourself, you can order my second book, The Resourceful Mother’s Secrets to Emotional Health or book an appointment with me for life coaching. I am passionate about helping families heal at their very core – physically, emotionally and spiritually – and look forward to helping YOU if you need me.